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Wednesday, September 3, 2014

16 Foolproof Dating Strategies

1. Process of elimination
2. Burrow under tree, emerge every 17 years
3. Bingo night
4. Prowl outside speed dating events for the rebound
5. Turn self into frog
6. Wait for AI to improve
7. Sabotage friends' relationships to improve your own chances
8. Administer lie detector test on first date
9. If at first you don't succeed, repeat previous mistakes
10. Accept nothing less than perfection
11. Rifle through celebrity crush's garbage
12. Change relationship status to what it ought to be
13. Wear protection while handling dangerous chemicals together
14. Don't ask, don't tell
15. Become witty & charming
16. Talk with mouth full of Nutty Cow