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Friday, August 15, 2014

13 Fantastic Reasons To Stop Running

1. Treadmill getting dizzy
2. Other contestants have gone home
3. Problems solved
4. Nowhere left to go
5. Loser rats proclaim you race's winner
6. Trip over beard
7. Pebble stuck in shoe enters bloodstream
8. Neighborhood children beat you up stairs to museum
9. Bionic legs run out of batteries
10. Would rather be earning calories
11. Meant to go to Burning Man, not Running Man
12. No longer being chased
13. Realize hunger inside you was for Nutty Cow